


How it is Supposed to Feel

by Anonymous



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: College AU, M/M, homophobia kind of?, not much plot beyond the relationship lol, some chatlogging going on, super cheese fest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 04:54:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12314148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Shiro has a mystery lover~





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> vore me mrkrabs is pidge

**_KEITH CONFIRMED CRYPTID_** >7 participants

 **the tailor:** yo

 **Hunko Love:** hullo

 **the tailor:** you ever think abt givin a bj in a pool??

 **Hunko Love:** …

 **Hunko Love:** no lance, cant say I do

 **the tailor:** youd have to go in holding ur breath

 **the tailor:** and you open ur mouth to give a succ but water gets in

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** who's dick are you thinking about lance? *insert suggestive sideye pic*

 **the tailor:** to be honest

 **the tailor:** my own

 **Hunko Love:** okay I have to get to asb im outtie 5000 on this convo

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** you are...

 **the tailor:** beautiful. amazing. perfect.

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** pathetic

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** get a girlfriend already

 **the tailor:** excuse u

 **the tailor:** im currently on a journey of self exploration

 **the tailor:** a single independent man who dont need a girl

 **Keith Kogane:** pathetic

 **the tailor:** KEITH

 **Keith Kogane:** yes

 **the tailor:** UR GAY

 **Keith Kogane:** …

 **Keith Kogane:** is that all?

 **the tailor:** you've given a succ once or twice

 **Keith Kogane:** …

 **the tailor:** how does one give a bj in a pool?? need for science

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** the hypothesis is: does lance is gay???

 **the tailor:** weak hypothesis, where is ur independent and dependent variables my dear gunderson

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** independent variable: does lance, dependent variable: is gay

 **the tailor:** answer the question keith!!!!!!!!!!

 **Keith Kogane:** I've never given a blowjob in a pool

 **the tailor:** what is even the point of you being gay

 **Keith Kogane:** maybe suck a dick or two yourself and find out

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** it'll be a cold day in hell when Lance gives in to his gay thoughts

 **the tailor:** why can't a straight man just have some heterosexual thoughts about sucking his own dick???

 **the tailor:** heterophobic

 **Coranic:** if I may

 **the tailor:** please do

 **Coranic:** that's gay

 **the tailor:** well shit if Coran says it, it must be true

 **the tailor:** when do I get my small dog and inclination to start a home garden

 **Hunko Love:** hey

 **Hunko Love:** home gardens are for everybody

 **Keith Kogane:** You're such an asshole Lance

 **the tailor:** SHRUGG i joke, keith doesnt even know how to take care of himself much less a dog

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** keith lived in the middle of the desert with nothing but his bare hands and his man musk

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** probably raised a wolf

 **Keith Kogane:** coyote

 **the tailor:** HOLY SHIT

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** DSFJKSERI I WAS JOKING

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** DID U REALLY

 **the tailor:** im losing my mind rn

 **Keith Kogane:** I didnt raise them

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** …

 **the tailor:** thats kind of a let down tbh

 **Keith Kogane:** they raised me

 **vore me Mr.Krabs:** SDFSDJKLF SDFD

 **the tailor:** ddFJ VNXMCV <S

 **the tailor:** DFL SJDKLM IMMM

 **Keith Kogane:** it is kind of funny i guess… but they taught me the hunt and led me to water

 **the tailor:** …

 **the tailor:** thats actually pretty cool i’d watch that movie

 **Keith Kogane:** thanks?

 

Lance glanced at the time before tossing his phone on the bedside table. He rolled over to hug the lump that was his big adorable boyfriend. Shiro leaned into his touch. Lance would have to wake him up soon. He sighed, brushing the messy white tuft of hair back. The face that seemed to always be contorted with worry and exhaustion, was smoothed out, content to dream. He deserved more time to sleep, but Lance knew if he didn't wake him now, they wouldn't have time for a little fun.

Clinging to Shiro’s left as the man laid on his back, Lance rested his hand on his partner's abdomen. He began massaging in small circular motions downward, past the flannel pajama pants and to his prize. He grasped Shiro's flaccid cock, stroking it gently. It rose with some interest as Shiro stirred, murmuring incoherence. Lance grinned impishly, leaving Shiro's side to hover over his legs. He shrugged the pants down as best he could with the underside being trapped between the mattress and his boyfriend’s bulk. Getting them low enough to cup his balls, Lance licked his lips before taking the head in his mouth. Suckling gingerly at the tip elicited soft moans from the older man. He pulled back to massage his balls, gently peppering them with kisses before trailing his lips up the length of Shiro's cock. This earned him a shiver and more cute little moans. Time for the kill. Lance held Shiro by the base, then sucked in as much as his mouth could handle. Angling so the tip pressed into the softness towards the back of his mouth, he bobbed a few times. Shiro let out more pleased breathy sounds, his legs spreading. Lance grinned ear to ear at the sign of want,

Lance had a natural talent, apparently no gag reflex was a God-given gift. Shiro thought so anyway, Lance never really thought about it. He was still new, however, and cocksucking, like any art, took practice and patience. He took a deep breath, remembering not to tense his jaw, slowly taking more of Shiro's length.

A sleepy eye cracked open.

“Lance,” he murmured.

Lance looked up, face contorted from trying grin with a mouth full. The sight shook Shiro into consciousness, his dick urging him to be awake to fully appreciate the view: his cute boyfriend, hair messy with sleep, blue eyes playful, had his mouth stretched around his cock first thing in the morning, as if that's all he ever wanted to do.

“Lance,” Shiro groaned out bringing his hand to run through his boyfriend’s cropped brown hair.

Lance preened at the unfettered desire that rolled out of Shiro. He placed his hands on the outer of Shiro's thighs as he braced himself to suck with more vigor. Shiro leaned his head further back into the pillow, unleashing breathy moans and lance's name.

This was him, Lance thought, it was himself drawing all these sounds and reactions from Shiro. Shiro wanted him. He moaned around his cock and he could feel the tremble in Shiro's thighs. The hand on his head slid down his neck to hold a steadying grip at the crook.

Lance picked up the pace bobbing and sucking Shiro’s dick and let go of one of his thighs to reach down his own shorts.

“Don't” Shiro's voice was a wreck, husky from sleep and desire.

Lance's hand stopped just short of his own erection. It was disappointing really, just a little friction, his body urged. He met Shiro with a pleading look.

“Don't-” Shiro cut himself off in a gasp as Lance swallowed “touch yourself.”

Lance groaned at the silent “or else” that laid at the end of that command. He brought his hand back up to jerk the shaft as his mouth paid special attention to the head. Shiro bucked nearly catching teeth, but Lance followed the motion.

“I'm c-close”

Lance knew this, Shiro's body giving him all the signs. With another deep breath he came back down, taking all Shiro's length.

“Lance, God Lance” Shiro's eyes fluttered shut as his grip on Lance tightened.

His cum was warm and overwhelming. Lance struggled trying to swallow it all, pulling back as it dribbled down his mouth. This boy was going to be the death of Takashi Shirogane.

“Good morning” Lance smiled, sitting up on his calves, and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Mornin’” Shiro croaked still recovering.

Sitting up some himself, Shiro ushered Lance into his lap. They kissed long and sloppy, Lance more giving and pliant than usual. He ground into Shiro's torso making the man chuckle.

“Please” Lance moaned into his mouth

Shiro complied, sitting up fully, slipping his left hand past the waistband of his shorts. At finally receiving contact, Lance jerked in Shiro's lap trying to get more. Shiro steadied him bracing his right with the crook of his elbow.

Kissing, needing too much brain power than Lance could muster, he buried his head into Shiro's neck.

Shiro thumbed the head gently, forefinger brushing over the tip to make a mess of the precum. Lance's hips bucked pleading with Shiro to get on with it already. He set a rhythm jerking him off until Lance began bucking into his fist wildly, moaning his name into his ear.

“Who's a good boy?” Lance tensed at that, gripping Shiro almost painfully. The tandem of his hips didn't slow however, chest bumping chest, chasing his orgasm.

“Are you a good boy for me Lance?”  Lance's brain fought between feeling embarrassed and giving into the desire to admit that yes he is the goodest boy. He settled for biting into Shiro's shoulder to stifle his moans.

Shiro leaned close to his ear, voice sultry “You're _my_ good boy aren't you?” And with that Lance was spilling all over Shiro's hand and stomach, gasping out an affirmative.

Shiro laid back into the pillows with a spent Lance on top of him. As Lance weaned off the afterglow, he nestled his chin on Shiro's chest peering into his eyes. Shiro knew that look, he was searching for something. He met the stare openly, he hoped Lance could find it, whatever _it_ was.

“That,” Lance broke into a wide grin, “was the best hand job of my life.”

Shiro chuckled, rubbing the back of one of Lance's ears. “Payback for a nice wakeup call.”

Lance preened, sitting up, straddling Shiro as he stretched. “You're welcome~”

Shiro gripped one of Lance's thighs as he turned to the side, flipping a yelping Lance to splay on the bed. He quickly got up to cage Lance between his arms and plant a dry kiss on his cheek. And, just as quick, got up to headed towards the shower.

“Shiro!”

He only laughed, leaving the door open in invitation.

\--

All dressed and ready, the two hung outside Shiro's front door. Shiro gave Lance a quick peck, which was dangerous out in the open, but he was feeling playful this morning. It was still dark out with no one around, Lance grabbed Shiro by the collar to pull him in for a deeper kiss. It was short, they really did have to leave, but just a little more was better than less.

Lance waved him off before settling into his little Honda. He patted the steering wheel lovingly, before he cranked up the heat and pulled out of the parking lot to head to his dorm.

This whole thing was fairly new. They'd been dating for a little over four months. There were several reasons they kept the relationship under wraps. For one, Shiro was on work study, his case was special as it was fluffed package through the military. While he was generally well liked, if a member of staff stood to dislike him, they could construe the rules to fire him. It was also Lance's first experience dating a man. Considering that the majority of their friend group was not straight, it wouldn’t be big deal for him to play around with boys. Only he wasn’t playing around and well it's _Shiro_. Shiro didn’t see how the latter was really point, but nonetheless, left it up to Lance to pull the plug when he was ready. And at this point Lance would be ready, but their friends added a different kind of pressure.

Their history was complicated and went years back, years that formed a fiercely loyal bond between the lot of them. If Lance fucked this up, it wouldn’t be just another botched relationship, it’d be a blow to the family. He could let the anxiety rip him apart all night long, but Shiro wouldn’t stand for that.

Lance felt giddy, cranking up some 2011-era pop song on the radio. He was so lucky, dammit! Shiro was hot and kind and so giving! He was slow with him, almost annoyingly slow, making sure Lance was comfortable and didn't feel pressured to do anything. They had yet to go past blowjobs and fevered grinding.

He ran his fingertips across his lips feeling the curve of his own smile. That was his first time swallowing cum and the taste wasn't spectacular, but he'd do it 1000 times over to see Shiro flushed and breathless like that again. He turned Shiro on! He did that! Lance could run a hundred miles right now, he settled for swerving wildly to the tune on the empty road.

\--

“Lance you are going to break your face if you smile any wider”

Lance looked over to his best friend unable to even feign offense. Instead he scribbled a penis on Hunk’s notes.

“Dude!”

The professor gave them a look of warning before returning to the lesson.

Hunk rested his chin on a hand, so as to cover his mouth and whispered “Is this about your mystery lover?”

“Maybe~” Lance whispered back, book propped up to cover his entire face. Subtlety was his strong point.

“Come on bro, I promised not to pry you gotta give me something.”

It was true, Lance couldn't hide anything from Hunk. Hell, most people couldn't hide much from Hunk. So a week into dating, Lance just let Hunk know that he was involved and that he'd really appreciate some privacy on this. They had a heartfelt bro to bro and Hunk promised to give Lance his room.

“Morning sex.” Lance grinned.

Hunk scrunched up his face.

“Well don't ask if you don't wanna know!” Lance laughed into his book

“Well I didn't know I didn't want to know!”

“Boys.” The professor looked them over with quiet irritation.

They shut up.


	2. Chapter 2

_“Shiro are you alright?”_

_All eyes turned to him._

_“Huh?  No yea, I'm good,” he answered, letting his hand fall back to his lap._

_Her eyes didn't look away, sized him up almost, as if to challenge him to keep pretending._

_“I'm just… I'm just having a bad prosthetic day” he let his hand drift to his arm again, trying to adjust it a bit through the hard fabric of his denim jacket._

_“Do you want to take it off?”_

_Lance's head snapped in surprise, gawking at the therapist, while Keith and Allura held calculatively neutral faces._

_“Not really.” Shiro shifted uncomfortable under their gaze._

_“Sorry Shiro, I didn't mean to put you on the spot, I just want you to feel comfortable here.” She gave his shoulder a squeeze before looking on, a motion that everyone understood meant to move on._

_It wasn't like he felt uncomfortable here. It was embarrassing to admit after only a few months, but he had felt really close to this group, having shared more about his time with Galra than with any of his family. It was just the arm. The prosthetic, what it meant, what it made him. He didn't even really know what it meant or made him, just that he’d rather keep it that way. If he didn’t think about it, it couldn’t be anything bad._

_The conversation drifted, Allura was talking about school. They did this a lot. Talk about the ugly without talking about the ugly. Dealing with its aftermath, but not It._

_Shiro shrugged off his jacket. Underneath was a black longsleeve with the left arm cut off, finished with a neat hem. It revealed the length of his prosthetic but not much skin as it had its own sort of sleeve beneath the metal that went up his arm. As he begun to loosen the metal cinch and just sort of twist the arm off, the conversation came to a halt._

_They all were looking at him again. Being stared at didn't bother him so much, or maybe it did. He really wasn't sure how he wanted them to react._

_He placed the arm on the ground next to his chair and rubbed the irritated nub a few times before pulling his jacket back on._

_The silence lagged a beat longer before Allura picked the conversation back up with grace. And that was that._

_\--_

Today was going to be a bad prosthetic day. Throughout a normal day the fit of the limb could be a bit loose or tight, and he could adjust the cinch to alleviate it some. But bad days, there would be no comfort, it would just ache and throb while the prosthetic hung off him like a log.

Shiro got in a shower more on the cool side. While his body protested, the warm end of his right arm sang. With some luck, maybe this shower would be all the nub needed.

When he stepped out, he took inventory of his body. It was littered with scars, some, a simple discoloration, others, a bumpy mess of tissue. Shiro pursed his lips remembering how clear his skin used to be. How he used to be, t-shirt clad, shorts too, if it was warm enough. The things he took for granted... He flexed a couple times, looking it over. His arm ended a couple inches below the elbow. Save for a single gangly scar, the skin at the rounded end, was smooth. Shiro felt it over with his hand before a wave of ugly feelings washed over him and he decided that was enough mirror time.

He got ready for the day, saving the arm for last. When it came to it he dragged his feet, really not thrilled to carry the dead weight that it would be today. If he didn't wear it, people would try to help him when he didn't need it, and stare, and ask questions he didn't want to answer. He sighed, putting it on.

Today was going to be a bad prosthetic day.

\--

The day seemed to drag on between grading papers and helping jaded students. Not to seem ungrateful, Shiro liked working as a TA and being able to see the look on student’s faces when a concept seemed to click. It was like showing them a magic trick. But nothing was more draining than dealing with people when he’d rather just sink into the earth. If he didn’t smile right away or laugh appropriately then people assume all sorts of things. He’s not mad, sad, or doesn’t like you, he’s just _exhausted_.

Lunch rolled around and Shiro took refuge in Coran’s empty office. He wasn’t assisting the man this semester, but Coran let him use office whenever. He was barely there himself anyway, always busy. Shiro didn’t know how the guy managed such a packed schedule.

A relieved sigh left him as he finally removed the prosthetic and it’s sleeve. He pulled out his phone.

 **imnotyoudad:** u comin over tonight?

 **the tailor:** aw u miss me? ;p

 **imnotyourdad:** yea I do

 **imnotyourdad:** like always

 **the tailor:** OMG SHIRO

 **the tailor:** i miss you too :*****

 **the tailor:** ofcourse i’ll be over

Shiro smiled wide. Lance made the best kind of mess of his mind. Like a teenager in his first relationship, Shiro's brain was putty just LanceLanceLance. It made it hard to think clearly about anything, from his work to his pain. This was probably dangerous, to be so infatuated with someone. Lance could ask him for the moon and holy fuck would Shiro try.

He sighed giving his face a hand scrub before reattaching his limb. At least Lance seemed to be maybe just a little, as crazy about him as he was for Lance.

\--

Shiro rushed home, well, as much as someone who respects traffic law can. He wanted to see Lance so much it was painful. Wanted his laugh to fill the apartment with magic and rattle his brain, push out all the bad.

Today was a school night so they'd probably just work side by side and end the night watching Netflix on the couch. Shiro snorted at himself, getting all excited to do something so boring… so domestic.

He started on dinner before dressing down to home mode. There was a jingling of keys as he padded back to the kitchen barefoot.

“Honey I'm homeee~” a mock high pitched voice rang.

Shiro gave him a key for convenience. Lance was there so often, the quicker he was inside, the less he could be seen hanging around Shiro's apartment.

Shiro wrapped his arms around his boyfriend at the door, showering his face with kisses before ending with a peck to the lips “Welcome home sweetie.”

“Wowee you really did miss me” Lance whispered in their close proximity. He wrapped his fingers around the back of Shiro’s head feeling the scruff of the his buzz, to pull him back down for a deeper kiss.

“Bad prosthetic day?” Lance posed the question, but they both knew that Shiro only really took it off for bed and showers, so if he wasn't wearing it...it was one of those days.

Shiro nodded, pulling his arms away and heading back to the kitchen. Lance dropped his stuff off in the living room before following and hopping up to sit on the counter. Lance chattered away, and just like that, Shiro was being swept away in Lance’s world. His animated talking about the mundane of his day, from shitty teachers to seeing a cute dog, let Shiro escape his own pain for a moment. Magic, this man was made of magic, Shiro was sure of it.

When the food was ready, the two took to the living room where Lance flipped on some sitcom they could eat to.

Lance sat back with a sigh “Shirooo that was soooo good, I definitely ate too much.”

Shiro chuckled, mirroring Lance so they sat shoulder to shoulder looking up to the ceiling. “You regularly eat Hunk’s cooking.”

“True,” Lance had a wicked glint to his eye. “But I don’t get to do this afterwards.” He threw a leg over him to straddle his thighs.

“I've seen you sit his lap” Shiro mused, appreciating the warm glow that fell on Lance’s skin. He brought a hand up to play with the longer bangs that framed the side of his face.

“Yea? Have you seen me do this to him?” Lance grinded his hips down and leaned forward, hands placed on Shiro’s chest for leverage. Then planted a chaste kiss on his lips.

Shiro laughed as they broke apart. “No, not so much that.”

Lance got up and tugged on Shiro’s hand to lead him to bedroom. He shucked the taller man’s shirt off and pushed him to lay on his back.

He suddenly became sheepish despite moving restraddle the man. “Hey...I wanted to try something. Can I touch your arm?”

Shiro, who’d been running his hand the length of Lance’s torso, paused. He looked at his nub, the throb was there, pulsing like it had a heartbeat of it's own. He didn't realize how long he'd been silent until Lance traced his jaw with his fingertips.

“Its okay if you don't want me to-”

“No. No, yea...I mean you can touch it, I just…”

Lance look at him expectantly.

“Touch me Lance.” Shiro lifted his right arm in offering. It was scary. Shiro let few people see him without his prosthetic and even less to touch it. He could count the number of people on one hand and still have leftovers. But Lance asked for it, so Shiro wanted to give it to him.

Lance wrapped his fingers beneath the tricep and touched thumbs at the bicep. Shiro shuddered violently and Lance quickly let go.

“Sorry! I'm sorry! Too much?” Lance’s face crumpled with worry.

“No you're fine” Shiro let out a strained chuckle as he scooted to sit up a bit more and rubbed the arm.

“It didn't hurt,” Shiro said but Lance looked skeptical. “Here let's try again” Shiro offered his arm, but Lance shrank back.

“Oh um… Not to push you to touch it, I know it's not pretty”

Lance’s hands flew to Shiro’s arm and he shuddered again, but lighter this time. “You're beautiful Shiro”

Shiro bit back a laugh

“Really! Hey, don't give me that!” Lance snapped, propping the arm up with one hand and caressing it with the other.

“Lance…”

“Shiro…” Lance mimicked his tone. “You're so hot, I don't know what to do with myself! When I'm not jerkin it like 16 year old, I just want to wax poetry about your eyes,” Lance had his arm in a firmer grip, massaging it by rolling his palms with some pressure.

Shiro wanted to respond, but Lance’s care was making his mind putty. All he could muster was a groan. Lance laughed, taking that as que to keep going.

“Your eyes...the thick brows that frame them...the scar that pinks your pale clear skin, makes it look like you're blushing sometimes, but it stands out lighter when you actually blush.” Lance continued the ministrations and Shiro was gone. All day, the arm tingled like balls of dull spikes had been rolling around it. Like invisible tendrils attempting to reach out and marionette a puppet no longer there. Then Lance touched him and placated the storm.

“Your jawline, and your neck that I just want to ravish, but I can’t… and the rare occasion you wear a shirt low enough to where your collar bones peak out, you have this one scar and it drives me up a wall because I just want to lick it...lick all of your scars, your skin, you in general I guess… ” Lance was red in the face. He didn't mean to keep going, just one word came out and the rest came barreling through as if they would never get another chance.

He focused on the arm and Shiro’s small noises of appreciation until it went quiet. Lance looked up to see Shiro’s head lolled a bit to the side, eyes shut in the calm way that signaled sleep. Lance smiled, hauling the large man to lay a bit more comfortable on the bed before turning the lights off and snuggling up beside him.

**Author's Note:**

> /jazz hands  
> hellllo im new here to the writing scene and high key embarrassed  
> if you have any tips or critiques for me, that would be greatly appreciated!


End file.
